When I was young, I dreamed of a man who will love me unconditionally, respect me, be my partner in life, someone who will be there through thick and thin, who is real a God-given gift.
Now, that I have found it but comes with a “complication,” not from me but with others who we live by.
I have been with my partner for almost 4 years now. 44 months to be exact. During the courting stage, he was so truthful to say that he was not single. He was married with 2 sons. He has been separated for 4 years ( not legally tho’ ) He had 2 relationships after the marriage did not work out. I was quite hesitant at first thinking that it will be “complication in time”… then for the fact that he won’t prioritize annulment ( Divorce is not an option because we don’t have it here in Philippines. ) as of the moment for he has 2 sons to support with. He would rather have the money intended for the education and if children is finished in school then will be an option (??)
Days went on, I said “yes” First stage of the relationship was like an up down hill.. Some days were good, some days were bad. Petty things were always an issue. Adjustment stage should I say, since we were only like 2 months in the relationship when he had to leave and work overseas.
I was quite defensive to my family to meet him and being asked of his personal details. His status, and the likes… It took a while when I had the courage to bluntly “displayed” our relationship to my family. Slowly, step by step I was introducing him to dad.. siblings, etc.
I wanted to build a good impression that he will not be judged based on his status. Based on that he was married legally. I may be wrong, I may be right. I was just guarding him and wanted to let them see for themselves first what kind of person he was.
A lot has happened, Now, my dad has known him for quite sometime and I can say that loves him too because he has never been like this from my previous relationships. But we haven’t yet had the perfect timing come to finally blurt out the magic word.
I wanted to tell them personally but time isn’t making its way. When he is here mom was away working overseas. When mom is here, he is away working overseas too. We got a chance this August when my brother got married but mom only stayed for 2 weeks and left immediately for she had work in UK.
My DILEMMA, knowing my mom to be so conservative and very traditional & “religiously-sacred” is for her to let me choose over her and my love of my life.
If that time comes, I will understand her stand point but I will have to go with my partner. I have nothing against her principles that I am going with a “married-man” but it does not make him less of a person. He may be married but he prioritized his children welfare. He did not forget what is his responsibilities to them. At the same time, he made sure that I am not being neglected too.
I just hope that if time permits, I know at first it will be hard but, I am positive that all be well in time…
Photo credits to owner. ( Taken from Google )